Just shy of a year ago we moved from a the city of Peoria, IL to a very rural small town of Hoven, SD. I've come to love the beauty of this rural place, the many friendships God has blessed me with here, and the joy of living just a few miles away from my in-laws. Somewhere between the beauty of rural South Dakota and life with an almost 1 year old I have learned of the importance of relationships in my life. Relationships/friendships have always been a huge part of my life. I would say I've always been one of those people who not only never wants that "alone time" but that I really don't enjoy it when I get it. Yes, there are rare occasions when an hour to myself is nice but overall I love being around people. It does not make any difference to me if it is just one other person or if it is 10, I just simply love it.
This brings me back to my reason for blogging about "Rural South Dakota". I feel I must make aware before I go on that I do love it out here in this rural community. That said, I must admit that after almost a year of life out here I am beginning to feel the desire and yearning for more people. I have some really great close friends out here, some of whom are stay-at-home moms and some who work. I love them all and feel completely blessed to have been given the friendships that I do have with each one of them. As I'm going through this tough time with Josiah (for those of you who don't know it seems we are dealing with one sickness after the other along with incoming molars, a child who screams if anyone else even tries to hold him, and along with all of that a little boy who used to seem so happy is most of the time crying and inconsolable) I'm realizing my need and Josiah's need (though he would probably disagree) to have more interaction with people. Living in such a rural community has left me at odds of what to do about getting Josiah more interaction with children. We just don't have all the different opportunities that those who live in a larger community can get. So now I am faced with a dilemma that I find to be rather important to the development of my son. How do I get him used to other children and other people if those opportunities are not around. My good friend Amber who I met a few months after we moved out here has two children. One is a little girl that is 3 and a son who just turned one last month. We have both struggled with these same issues and have found our friendship a huge blessing both for ourselves and for our children. Although, it seems our once a week play dates just don't seem to be enough.
To sum it all up I guess I am just struggling with how to give Josiah more opportunities for interaction with other children. Has anyone ever shared this experience of a rural community or know someone else who has? Any idea's anyone?
It seems that most of my blogs lately are asking for advice and/or comments and I do apologize for that. I guess being a first time mom is more difficult than I thought.
4 comments:
hey Tanna...i love reading your blog and while i don't really have any advice for you since I'm not a mom myself, I wanted to offer a few thoughts.
1. for me growing up exactly where you are right now, I didn't have a ton of social interaction that I rememebr until I started school. My mom would take me to Selby every now and then to a babysitter there, but for the most part, my only memories of friends I played with before I started kindergarten are Heidi and Brett. I know from stories that I had played w/ Heather, Kari, Philip, all of those guys too, but I don't have a recollection of it. I tell you this to reassure you that we (Lowry kids) turned out ok even without a hige neighborhood full of kids!
2. I've witnessed a lot of the same issues with my neices and nephews that live here in Nashville. it seems like all of them have gone through a phase where they didn't want to be held by anyone but their mom or dad and they would fuss for no reason. These kiddos have TONS of social interaction and it's still something that they struggled with. The good news is that they have all gotten over it too!
I just want to share those thoughts with you. I'm really scared about raising kids in the city...it will be so different from how I was raised in rural SD. when that time comes for our family I'll be asking you for advice!
Love you and your sweet family!
-Kajsa
Oh Tanna, I relate as Kajsa does when I read this post. You should talk to my mom and Garnet who lived in town before moving so far out to the country when they got married. I know Mom has told stories about how hard it was when we were younger! I'm pretty sure she ripped a bedspread once when she was down on her knees praying for patience! :) Even in the city, and even though I'm more of a homebody, it's hard being home with really young ones all day by yourself! Some things that I do (or should do) when it's hard to get out because of weather, sickness, or just the energy it takes to leave with 2 little ones, are....
* call friends & fam (need to do that more often)
* listen to music, podcasts, radio to try to give myself some adult mental exercise!
* commit to mini-trips (library, etc) Just being out for a drive is sometimes a REALLY good thing! The girls love the car and are usually enamored by watching people, etc. no matter where we go.
I will be praying for you. SD is definitely a UNIQUE challenge! I wonder if there are any books about being a mom in a rural area? There should be! I KNOW God will continue to give you the strength and creativity to come up with things that help you get through. SD needs more social bugs like you!
Hi Tanna! Saw your comment on my blog and yes! I've got gobs of mascara left! I've got black and Black/Brown in the Lash Lengthening formula and Black in the Waterproof formula. If you're interested, shoot me an email at sldane {at} hotmail {dot} com.
Hope you had a great weekend with your boys!
Tanna--two words--more babies:) You and Josiah will then have all the social interaction that you can handle. Seriously, I think what you are experiencing is just part of being a stay at home mom The days can seem so long, but the years pass so quickly. As for Josiah--even Kajsa went through a stage at about age 1 where she only wanted her mother. Didn't last long.
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