Tuesday, December 8, 2009
Am I the only one?
Yesterday Josiah had his 9 month wellness check up (2 weeks early) and I was pretty excited because there were no shots that he needed to get so we could just get in and get out and everything would be fine. At least that's what I thought until our doctor told me she is concerned about his weight. He weighed in at 19lbs and according to his weight to height ratio he is now down the the 20th percentile for his weight (His cheeks make him look like he is a big boy but he really is pretty skinny). She is concerned because he continues to drop on the charts and this one in particular was a pretty big drop (30% drop). Since his last apt. at 6 months he has only gained one pound. I really haven't been concerned at all because he eats pretty good (although he did decide that he was not going to take a bottle anymore...at all...and I'm thinking of being done nursing soon) but I just didn't think this was something I needed to think about let alone be concerned about. I know I am probably just being overly worried about nothing at all and I'm trying not to be but I just can't get myself to stop. The weight issue is just the topping to my battle with worrying about him. I have a lot of friends with babies and the conversation that we usually have is referring to what milestone our baby is at. Milestones are great and I love talking about them but I usually leave the conversation feeling like Josiah is behind in some way. Right now I'm worrying about him not crawling yet. He is 8 1/2 months old and I feel like he should be because every other baby is. Am I crazy to be thinking like this? Am I the only one that worries about this stuff? I know I need to give it all to the Lord and I'm working on doing that but I wouldn't be honest if I didn't say it's been a huge struggle. Thanks for letting me share my heart.
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9 comments:
I'm sure you're not the only one worrying. We ALL do. I know girls and boys are different, but Bella gains weight SOOO slowly. We just had her 15-months checkup and she had gained 2 pounds from her 12 month. If the doctor is concerned then I would listen to her/him, but personally, I would just be patient and allow him to grow at his speed. It's hard not to compare (that's how I am with Bella's teeth right now)... but each baby is so different. I'll keep you in my thoughts, dear friend.
Hi. I don't know you, but I'm a friend of Jenny. I check your blog often because our little ones are almost the same age (our little girl was born March 23). I totally know what you mean about comparing your child to everyone else's. Our daughter has no interest in crawling (in fact she just recently decided that rolling was kind of cool) and I keep comparing her to friends whose babies are speed crawling and pulling themselves up in their cribs, but then I think "What's the rush?" Cause once they become mobile there's no going back. So, I'm just trying to enjoy this time while I can. Anyway, all that to say...you are not alone.
I understand exactly where you are coming from Tanna (and Stephanie!). Ryan was born March 26th and is not crawling yet. And he is in the 5% for weight and similar for length. And I am not teaching him how to read like a coworker of mine is pestering me about (seriously). There are just so many areas to compare, and it's such a slippery slope. Josiah is perfectly made by God and is growing exactly the way he should be for how he is made.
But if the doc is concerned, have them give you an action plan of how to get his weight up and I'll be praying that he will take to a bottle again. That can be stressful.
All in all, you're doing a great job Tanna and I hope you will find peace today.
Hey Tanna, this will not be the first or last of your concerns about different things that people are comparing or even what your doctor is saying! I just think that you learn to understand your own kids and their needs and strengths. I think every kid does things on their own time, when they are ready. If he's not ready to crawl, then he's not... some kids just go right to walking or they end up crawling for so long because they just don't want to walk. It's just how they feel. Cooper wouldn't start eating regular food until his was well past a year and that was really scary because I wasn't sure if he was getting enough nutrients. But he just one day started to eat regular food. Just because he felt like it. I think that you are doing everything right for your family, even if you sometimes feel like you could be or should be doing something different.
Good luck with everything and in a blink of an eye he will decide that he wants to crawl, or walk, or talk, or tell you "momma, I love you"! It's literally a blink and they change and there is one more thing to worry about but love!
P.S. - It's funny how quickly you can forget your own child's milestones! I was looking back at my blog archives to see when exactly Bella started crawling and her weight, etc. She was 15 lbs. at 7 months and just weighed in at a whoppin' 20 lbs. at this 15-months checkup! That's 5 lbs. in 8 months. :-) Some babies are just slower...
Thanks everyone! It's comforting to know that I am not alone in all of this. I really appreciate all of your comments and insight, thank you!
it's hard not to compare isn't it? i do the same thing with owen frequently... he is so much bigger than all the other kids his age - and even older. propotionally bigger, but bigger nonetheless. i am sure josiah is doing great - he looks so happy in all the pictures. and also, hopefully as a comfort - my parents have neighbors with a boy who is close to 2 - i am pretty sure that owen outweighs him or is pretty close at 23 pounds. he is small, but happy and healthy. i know as moms we worry and want to make sure we are doing the right things for our babies, but i am sure you are doing wonderfully and making the best decisions for your little guy!
Tanna-
My kiddo is now 14.5 months old and now walking but..he didn't crawl until he was 10.5 months old. Everyone kept asking me if he was walking yet and I was like umm he's not even crawling. I also wouldn't worry about the weight thing... River didn't gain any weight from 8 months to 9 months (he was around 18.5lbs). Now he's about 22.5 lbs.
Julia
Hey girl, hang in there...Josiah is growing and thriving and you'll continue to do what's in his best interest. If you need to feed him more, then feed him more, no big deal! As for the crawling thing, I've just heard over and over again how all babies hit different milestones at totally different ages. Brady didn't crawl until 11 months, and although he's not perfect, I think he turned out just fine! Be patient and just enjoy him at whatever stage he's in. I love you!
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